When you don't show up to host the Blawg Review as scheduled, and don't offer so much as an apology or a really good excuse like my dog ate my blog, that's just unacceptable. Pardon me, sir? What's your name? Are you in this class? Sit down then, and pay attention if you will, please. You've already wasted enough of our time.
I'm Professor Kingsfield, and I'll be your host of Blawg Review #60, today. Some of you might have heard of me, and came prepared. The rest of you will be prepared next time.
Where were we now? Yes. You come in here with a skull full of mush and you leave thinking like a lawyer.
Today, we will review last week's material in a number of subjects that some of you might think you already understand well enough. Let us disabuse you of that notion. First, a subject near and dear to my heart.
The Law of Contracts
Is an agreement written in blood enforceable? Mr. Lattman
Could the Los Angeles County Sheriff's release policy to ameliorate a jail overcrowding problem be Constitutionally deficient on gender equity grounds? Mr. Volokh
What's the most jail time one can do in a case related to trademark infringement? Mr. Umansky
Does anyone have any thoughts on patents? Is the international drug patent system preventing developing countries from obtaining needed medicines, vaccines and diagnostic tests? Mr. Albainy-Jenei
The young man talking in the back there. Yes, you. The one with the Einstein T-Shirt on. I don't know your name. Are you sure you belong here? As long as you and your lady friend there are laughing, perhaps you might share your discussion with everyone, provided it has something to do with intellectual property, of course. Speak louder! Fill the room with your intelligence! ... I'm going to have to ask you to leave the class for that...You... are a SON OF A BITCH, Kingsfield. ...Young man! That is the most intelligent thing you've said all day. You may take your seat.
Criminal Law and Civil Rights
Should a prison inmate be entitled to a state-funded sex change operation? Mr. Kaimipono. That's not a last name? Okay, that's what's down here on the seating plan.
Is the legal system is biased against fathers, favoring mothers in custody battles. Mr. Seth. Is that your first name? Sorry.
Seriously, now, if Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie split up, who gets custody of the new baby domain names? Yes, Seth?
Mediation & Arbitration
What are the differences between mediation and arbitration, and is there such a thing as binding mediation? Mr. Williams
Would arbitration be better with the "loser pays" rule? Mr. Wilson
Are no holds barred in current labor disputes? Mr. Secunda
Technology and the Law
Can't we use new technology, and implant some sort of radio frequency ID chips, to keep track of sex offenders and immigrants? Mr. Farry
The Green Bag's distribution of the new Justice Kennedy bobblehead to 1,710 of its subcribers raises an issue. What are the tax consequences of the bobbleheads? At what point is a valuable item received by a subscriber treated as income? Mr. Caron
Laws of Foreign Jurisdictions
Should the SCOTUS take into consideration the decisions of courts in foreign jurisdictions? What do they know about what the law should be in the United States? Mr. Geist
Why does it matter that the NSA call program would be illegal under European privacy law? Ms. Bignami
How many of you here have blogs? Raise your hands. I see...most of you. Well, maybe I should blog, too, perhaps anonymously. What do you think about law professors blogging? Mr. Caron, Mr. Kennedy
Can a lawyer actually make money with a law blog? Anyone? I'm not sure I have your name here. Yes, you, the young lady in the Blogger T-shirt.
Law Practice Management
How are you doing? Mr. Maister
Do you still want to be a lawyer? Mr. Kerr
Be Prepared Next Time
Does anybody know what day it is today? Mr. Svenson
We're letting you off a bit early today, because we got started late. If you'll take some advice from an old professor, don't bother with lengthy law review articles and legal texts this summer. But do keep in touch with Blawg Review. And remember. There's more to life than law. I see a hand up in the back there. Yes. Do you have something important to add? Mr. Hunt, is it? Congratulations. Class dismissed.
[Editor's Note: Professor Kingsfield's Blawg Review #60 is an alternative to Blawg Review #60: Gimme Some Truth at The Trademark Blog, which is not by any measure a Blawg Review. Regular participants in Blawg Review make their submissions and recommendations expecting that the host will, within the bounds of individual creativity, prepare a Blawg Review. It is essential to our project that we live up to those expectations, and not use the privilege of hosting Blawg Review for some other presentation, however interesting that might be.]